bad parenting

I shouted at Adi today.. Uncontrollably like a histeric person and feeling shameful to say that I broke the top part of a lid as I was working at kitchen at that time. I feel bad about myself. I don’t have the energy to explain why and the details but I feel bad.. very bad. Tears are flowing non stop.. I am sitting at living room typing this post and Adi is at bed room lying upside down on the bed. I don’t know how I will make it up with her.. Something is bothering me.. I am not able to pin point at the issue and something is bothering me very much. I have become a whining girl, crying every other day for no reason. Absolutely no reason from the surface but there is a reason deep in my mind that is triggering all this. At this point, I am not able to decipher this reason and even if I do, I don’t know if I will have a solution for it. So, why bother to know the reason? Is this how life treats every body? why is grass is always greener on the other side? where does all my gyans for others vanish when I am at it..  Like I always promise myself every time, I promise now that I will not shout at Adi anymore and be harsh to her and sincerely hope that she will erase this incident from her memory… Today is just another bad parenting day!!!

26 thoughts on “bad parenting

  1. hugs hugs and tight hugs Ani. It happens. Calm your mind and talk to her. Relax yourself. I think you are burdened with more work. Try to take a break if possible. You will be alright. Cheer up.

  2. I have been through this phase.. The breaking things in kitchen, the shouting and the non stop crying… Worst is seeing your kid cry and knowing he doesn’t deserve it… So.. Can just say few things…
    It helps to know what’s causing it.. It usually relates to a single incident… Yoga helped me channelise it.
    Kids forget… We don’t forget the guilt, but they do…. I started telling my son that I am in a mood where I will be angry for no reason, and it would be best to talk less. He started getting it and gave me space to overcome it.

    And it’s not bad parenting – just a bad day!! The fact that you feel guilty makes you a good one!

    • Hey Archana, welcome here and thanks for your kind words..I know the cause.. Its my stress and irritation.. I have also said the same to Adi, to ignore me sometimes when I am out of my mind.. That day, after a while she came and apologized to me as she realized that it was her fault.. thanks again!

  3. Hugs Ani….. Few days back I was in your shoes ….. Some days are just bad…..I’am sure tomorrow will be better…..you have a wonderful daughter, I’am sure she’ll understand if you talk to her…..cheer up….

  4. right.. what makes you think its bad parenting .. (I am not saying its good you shouted), You wrote in the end promising you wont shout .. SO you learnt something today ..

    I think there is too much pressure on KIDS growing up and ON PARENTS too about this parenting Pallava, I think it is all this pressure that is bringing the bad parenting out ..

    when i was growing up things were different , maybe we need to go back to those days keep it simple ..

    Take care of yourself .. and this is what you do.. go to the little ones room and Lie upside down next to her .. and I bet in a Few second you both will be talking again ..

    god bless the little one, a big big hug .. Talking helpssssssss always 🙂 and go and change that LID now that you broke 🙂

    • the problem is I don’t keep up with my promise Bikramji.. This is not the first time its happenings and that’s the reason I wanted to record it here.. At least, now some sense will get into me.
      I want to keep that lid at least to remind me of my mistake.. She came to me in few mins, said sorry and patched up.. Isn’t that so sweet of her..

  5. Aiyo..its just normal behaviour da..we all have to release the pressure cooker in our brains..once a while..or else, you get too stressed…Even I shout at the brat and wonder why the hell did I do it..but its done…I usually go to the brat and apologise…even if its her mistake..tell her that I had no business getting angry and I am sorry..but..she was wrong..yaada yaada..hugs hugs hugs okay? Its fine..its normal..and Its human eh?

  6. Hugs Ani. I am sure Adi understands you. I dont remember amma scolding or beating me at all, but amma remembers it all the time and feels hurt too, even after I tell her I dont remember anything and she was a wonderful mom. So dont blame yourself for anything, I am sure Adi understands and forgets this incident.

  7. oh hugs dear.. it happens a lot to me.. most of the times i end up showing the frustration which i have on my in-laws on my little baby.. i just cant stop myself from crying when the little one comes to me and says sorry for the mistake which she has not done.. :(..

  8. Oh Ani! It happens to all of us. Kids, work, home..the constant demand which never lets up and we all snap. But the best thing is the kids forget, they love, they smile, they hug and they forget and most importantly they forgive.
    Give Adi a hug and here is a huge one for you!

    • thanks for the hugs Comfy and hugs to you too.. that’s right they forgive so easily.. I only hope that she doesn’t take after me on this.. She apologized to me after realizing her mistake and we are back to normal..

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