30 | January | 2017 | Between my littles and me

***rant alert***

When I returned home, the house (living room – first sight as you enter) was at its worst state and kids were watching TV. I had plans to sit with LHB in the evening to study but my mood was completely off once I looked at the situation at home. It did not help at all when LHB was saying “Appa is watching TV all day”. He did laundry but the state of home got on to my nerves instantly. I didn’t react, took hot shower, went about doing my work, took pain killers for muscle cramps and retired to bed. I was too tired to even talk. I had to clear the kitchen before cook aunty came and she also decided to give me hard time yesterday asking me to clean this, cut that et all.

And, I lost my cool today morning when I saw a bunch of wires and some more items sitting at the pooja counter top. They are there for past 4 days waiting to be sorted out by M which is driving me nuts every time I see them but I didn’t lose my temper until today morning. I don’t know if its just me but when the house is not clean it has a direct deep impact on the state of my mind and the family doesn’t seem to care about it at all. I hate to see Adi sitting amidst that clumsy environment and watch TV with a “I don’t bother” attitude. CLEANING HOME is not a one time thing or a weekend chore or just my task. IT HAS TO BE AN EVERYDAY CHORE BY EVERYONE IN THE FAMILY SAME AS HOW WE EAT 3 MEALS A DAY. I mean I understand that LHB is at this prime age to make a mess right after we clean up but can’t the rest of the clan just do cleanup after him periodically to keep the home tidy? Enough said!! (sorry about the caps. I have still not got back to my normal state yet!!)

So, today morning when I had to offer to God and pray and saw all those wires at the counter top I lost my cool and exploded. I hate to judge but I don’t care what the 3 of them did during my absence, I texted him while leaving from the friend’s place and it is an one hour drive. Couldn’t he be little considerate of me and tidy up the home and wires in that one hour? Is it a demanding ask? That one hour of his effort would have aided me to spend more quality time with kids last evening and have started this week on a happy note. I was grumpy last evening and it is continuing. I was shouting in front of Adi and I am sure all this is only painting a bad picture to her. I dread to even think in lines of the impact of this to kids. I am only getting distant with them as much as I want to be close to them. Just imagine me walking around grumpy during the limited time I get to spend with them? They are clearly not getting the best of me when I am so much pre-occupied with things like this. Sigh!!!

I wanted to work from home today as these muscle cramps didn’t get any better but given the state of home (mostly living room) I have to clean it all before I start the day. I can’t do the cleaning with current grumpy state so I just literally dragged myself to work. Don’t know what is in store for rest of this week!!!!

It doesn’t feel good to almost end blogathon with this big rant!!!!!! I am extremely sorry folks!!!

On Friday after indulging myself with all items from my “not to eat” list, I ended the day with international buffet dinner at LHB’s school. Can it get any better? We attended “International family fun night” at his school and got to see various performances like African dance with drums, Bollywood fusion, Irish dance. The boy was all game to join the stage whenever audience were invited to dance along. He made few moves following the crowd and it was hilarious to watch him shake and move.

On Saturday, we left home in the morning to go meet our old neighbors. For those who follow my blog for few years would know our family christmas tradition of visiting our old neighbors (4 now 3 amazing old sisters). We couldn’t get time to meet that worked for both of us during holidays so met them this weekend. Adi was super excited to see them. LHB was all shy. They were amazed at seeing the kids grow so fast. It was a short 30 minutes visit and we exchanged gifts This time I got them a jewelry box with engraving of “happy holidays” and kids name on it.

Then we headed to a birthday party at an inflatable jumping spot. Kids had good time at the party, I sneaked to jump/slide a little too. LHB unusually was fussing to eat the pizza and threw up later. Adi felt sick too. They were fine later.

After reaching home, I did a quick clean up, made things ready for the family and set off alone to friend’s home. His wife is leaving to India this week and she needed help with the packing. Original plan was for all 4 of us to go but she suggested not to bring kids as the house had things all over the place. She mainly needed help with sorting out the kitchen so it made sense for me to go. I bought dinner and took Tea for us. Once reached, we had the tea and started straight with the cleaning. We did not stop until 1am, then went to bed and resumed packing next day morning. It was around 2pm next day and we were only half done. I didn’t have a choice but to return home as I had to call the cook aunty for this week. I felt incomplete leaving her at that state but at least we were done with the kitchen and discarding donation, recycle and garage bags. Reached home in the evening, M did a quick grocery run, got the aunty home and rest of the day was spent in getting ready for this work week.

Alert: Looking at the length of the post I split it as 2 parts. I am posting part 2 in few minutes and that is going to be a huge rant!!!!