2022 has been another great year of learning for me. I had the privilege of having a personal coach for the entire year through work and some of the tools and techniques shared by the coach helped me to grow as a better person both in personal and professional life.
Some things I am used to do (of course unintentionally) is during a conversation I always try to relate my life to the experience or incident shared by the other person and will share that experience with the other person in same conversation. For instance, if they say something about their child then I have to share a similar incident about my child. I would go on to elaborate so much that I will take over the conversation. I don’t do this intentionally or to hurt the other person. I am just very eager to share everything to the very detail (bright side is I could have developed my profession as story teller). I never thought about how the other person will feel as I never felt offended when someone else cuts me, I would just cut them again and consider it a lively conversation.
Since last year, especially now that I am a people leader at work, I am learning to listen actively, its okay to not have my voice to be the last in a conversation, its okay if I am not able to share my experience, its more important to let the other person finish and just listen. And, if at all I want to cut it short then I am learning to acknowledge what they are saying and then politely take it over. Communication is an art and its even better if we use LAVA technique. LAVA is Listen, Acknowledge, Validate and Act. Its work in progress and I am improving day by day. This applies to both professional and personal life
Next is to get defensive when someone shares a feedback. My instant reaction is to justify the situation and find all the reasons as how I am not solely responsible for the situation. I do accept my mistakes and think genuinely about corrective measures but that comes later after self introspection. I learned that by getting defensive I am not allowing myself to listen to the complete feedback and internalize it. I learned to consider feedback as a constructive measure that can allow me to improve. Of course, I need to be aware of who gives the feedback and what is their intention behind sharing the feedback. It all starts with acknowledging and accepting that I am not Ms. Perfect, I have my own flaws, blindspots and feedback is a great tool to identify and improve on them. Feedback is a gift.
This also applies to giving feedback. Setting the right intention and then sharing actionable feedback is much better than just throwing a piece of advise. If you are not prepared then just don’t rush to say something. Gather your thoughts and articulate it better. Again, work in progress 🙂
I guess this all rolls up under being mindful of everything I do. Have a deep sense of understanding of the intention of why I do what I do especially when I am torn between execution of different tasks of multiple streams in a day. Acceptance of the situation goes a long way.
There is one more that helps me to maintain my sanity and I will write about it another day. Its blogathon after all 🙂
We started our return journey early in the morning and still few hours away from home. The boys had chinese takeout for lunch which would not have been an option if Akka was with us. She would have taken us to either Taco bell or Chick fill A. We felt the absence of her influence.
She did a video call later in the day to give us a room tour after organizing it. Proud moment for Amma to see everything neatly organized and the walls decorated to her taste. She was very particular about the room decor. LHB talked more to his parents as the back seat partner was not there and parents struggled to their best to keep him engaged 🙂 Amma made him the DJ to play songs. He alternated songs between his playlist and Amma’s playlist for a good two hours!
I will continue to write about the changes and adjustments in our life.